Unforgiveness – Cancer of the Soul
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Much attention goes to cancer these days because it plagues people to epidemic proportions. An analogy in the spiritual realm is in order. Just as cancer destroys many physical bodies, unforgiveness is destroying many a soul.
Unforgiveness is to the soul what cancer is to the physical body. Just as some forms of cancer start from one bad cell and grow rapidly, so to does unforgiveness eat away at our spirit until we are spiritually dead. Unforgiveness is undoubtedly one of Satan’s best tools to cripple the church of Jesus Christ, rendering it ineffective in its’ ministry here in the world.
Unforgiveness impacts us physically too. Carrying an emotional load takes its toll on our bodies and minds as well. We suffer from all the tension these feelings of unforgiveness create. Numerous illnesses have their beginnings in the stress caused by unresolved problems of this nature, so if this stressor is taken care of early a lot of difficulties can be prevented.
Unforgiveness is selfishly holding on to our own points of view; always looking for someone else to admit they are wrong. By harbouring unforgiveness and resentments, we are hurting ourselves. We become a slave to the situation causing us to cling to our unforgiveness. And Satan surely becomes a much harder taskmaster once he has us under his control. In time, unforgiveness turns to resentments and then to hatred. It’s a downward spiral that Satan employs to destroy all humanity.
Thankfully, there is a cure for unforgiveness. A way to beat this cancer of the soul. The way to renewed spiritual health lies in forgiveness and in trusting the Lord to work where we can’t. Then and only then will the body of Christ have a profound effect upon this world in which we live.
An unforgiving spirit affects more than just the person carrying it. How many families, churches and organizations have been torn apart by unforgiveness? One person harbouring unforgiveness is like leaven in a pan of dough. In time, it grows and soon is shot throughout the whole batch. We have all seen how one disgruntled person in an organization can cause trouble if unattended. So many families and individuals struggle with the hurt and injustice of their past; unwilling to address what it is that is plaguing them. Satan is having a heyday. This is crippling believers and hurting the cause of Christ, for He calls on us to forgive in the same way we want Him to forgive us. Recall Luke 11:4, “Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us”.
When we carry unforgiveness in our hearts for a long time, our thinking becomes clouded and we see only one small part of the much larger picture life paints for us. We go on a “pity party”, finding all kinds of excuses to justify our cause, all of which serve to keep us down. We’re miserable inwardly and it begins to show in our attitude and actions. Our unforgiveness becomes a festering sore that doesn’t heal and that in time will lead to multitudes of problems. By not letting go, we are telling God that he doesn’t know how to handle our problem. This runs against all that we know of God.
As we go through life there are many times when we say or do things that hurt other people. It may be done unintentionally, but the hurt is there the same. As Christians, we need to recognize our differences in personalities and work together. If it means we “agree to disagree”, then so be it. We will never all agree on every topic and we don’t need to, either. We don’t all have to have the last word. Let’s accept each other the way Christ accepts us, for who we are, human beings made in God’s Image.
Jesus has come to set us free – free from ourselves, and all the worries we create. He has promised us abundant life. “I am come that you may have life abundantly.” Jesus says in John 10:10. Let’s give the reins of our life to the Almighty. The one who knows the end from the beginning and has had experience in dealing with these very things that haunt us many times over.
When we forgive others the wrongs we feel, that does not mean those wrongs will always be corrected right away, but the important thing is the condition of our own heart. Not whether we can fix other people. God knows our hearts as well as the hearts of those whom we need to forgive. The Holy Spirit can work things out in others if we only get out of the way. It doesn’t matter if we don’t see an answer right away. Let’s trust our heavenly Father to take care of those things over which we have no control.
Spending time in God’s Word helps us to prepare our hearts for the Holy Spirit to work in the situations that cause us so much hurt. Time spent in God’s presence is never wasted. O how wonderful to feel His presence when we come to Him in prayer! Many times our perspectives change after even a small amount of time with the Lord, and with that change, new courses of action become clear.
Having said all this, there are times when despite our sincere and prayerful efforts, it proves humanly impossible to find reconciliation with certain people. Often due to a personality clash, an unwillingness on the part of one person to make things right, or possibly even mental illness. Does this leave us trapped, a slave to the other person’s hurt and resentment? No! The Lord looks at our hearts and knows where we are. If we leave the situation with him, we can be at peace knowing that God can handle things better than we ever will. As we leave our interpersonal struggles with Him and forgive, the joy of the Lord becomes our strength.
I have been in a similar situation where despite my best efforts reconciliation was not going to happen. I struggled with this problem for a long time. It came to consume my every waking hour and took much of my energy. How could I go on in my Christian life with this cloud over my head? My answer came as I spent time in prayer and meditation. I could forgive this person in my heart. I could sincerely pray for them. The Lord showed me that the problem was a lot deeper than the things I was concerned about. God was asking me to let go, to give things over to Him, and to forgive. And I was able to do this with the Lord’s help. I found a deep peace come into my heart. A deep indescribable sense of the Lord’s presence. How wonderful to belong to the great creator of the universe! The Holy Spirit would work in this other person’s life. In time I trust there will be complete reconciliation. This also cleared the line for me to communicate with my God unhindered. As Psalm 66:18 says, “If I had cherished sin in my heart, the Lord would not have listened.”
How wonderfully patient the Lord is with us. Some of us need more time than others. So, in the same way, let’s be patient with those around us who are hurting and struggling. Maybe a prayer on their behalf will be what it takes for them to have the victory they are longing for. Christ has promised to hear and answer prayer that comes from a clean heart (Psalm 66:18).
Just as cancer can sometimes be uprooted and destroyed when detected early enough, so to can any unforgiveness we may be harbouring be dealt with before it takes hold and destroys us. Why not let go and let God have his way? As it says in Ephesians 3:20, “Now unto Him who is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think”. Let’s take God at His Word and expect with him we can beat the disease of unforgiveness.
